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Welcome back to the Hyperbolic Age, a time that time forgot, when men were drunk, women were unhappy, and goat was the other white meat. Into this melodramatic yet somehow lost epoch strides a mighty figure, a king cursed to never again remember his homeland who wanders the thousand-and-one kingdoms in search of what he's lost. His name is Vengar, and he's a barbarian.
Shudder with anxiety as our hulking hero drinks foul concoctions unfit for human consumption. Thrill as he kidnaps dark ruffians and wages war against barbarians even bigger than himself, and shake your head in dismay as he does irreparable damage to his liver.
In this episode...
On a quest to recover his stolen property, Vengar arrives in the northern lands of Sunderia, a harsh and unforgiving region that sees little tourism. There, he enlists the aid of a mysterious rogue and then charges off to confront the monstrous warlord who holds what he once held dear.
Can Vengar overcome the warlord and his Glum Horde? Will his mysterious new ally stab him in the back? And what the heck is with the goat milk, anyway?
Clocking in at roughly 35 pages, The Salvaged Sword of Vengar is a whole lot of adventure in a petite package.
Vengar the Barbarian! The mighty strange adventures of a strangely mighty man! Brought to you by Oktopod Digital Press, a new idea in independent publishing.
- Sales Rank: #1546013 in eBooks
- Published on: 2012-01-22
- Released on: 2012-01-22
- Format: Kindle eBook
About the Author
Writer of high adventure, dark drama, and quirky comedy, set in vibrant worlds that bend the imagination. Proud self-publisher, nerd, video game enthusiast, and Mexican-American.
Originally fabricated in Silicon Valley before being shipped to Rocklin, CA. Now plugged into a general purpose terminal, burning clock-cycles on text and image manipulation.
Looking to reinvent how independent authors share their work, and broaden the marketplace by helping new readers find it.
We can turn the world into readers.
Most helpful customer reviews
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
Reminds me of reading Conan as a kid, but better!
By Chris D
Conan the Barbarian as a comedy? Well, it works. The witty dialog will take keep you smirking as you follow this tale of Vengar the Barbarian (the second with hopefully many more to come), in search of his oversized sword, leading up to an ending that wasn't quite what I expected. Certainly I will never think about goat's milk in the same way again.
Thanks to Ted Boone for the correction, I really need to go back and read the first Vengar story!
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
Lots of fun in a quick read
By David Alexander
Like the first Vengar story, this was a quick, fun read that brightened up a boring afternoon. It doesn't take itself seriously and plays around with the cliches of the genre while still delivering an enjoyable swords and sorcery story. I look forward to further installments in Vengar's adventures!
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
The Sound of Robert E. Howard Laughing
By John Green, NCGBT
"Morning came upon the steppe like a drunken sailor: clumsy, premature and with nonetheless great satisfaction." When you start right off the bat with some of the silliest, deep purple prose you've ever read, you know what you're in for. It's like reading a lost Mel Brooks treatment written by Leslie Neilsen.
Vengar's been looking for his mighty sword, Ridikulon... which he somehow misplaced during a night of revelry, and takes on the services of Shakal the Thief to help him reclaim it. A walking column of an evil warlord, Columnar, controls the Glum Horde, and needs the sword to revive the legendary Sunder Man and take over Sunderia. Why anyone would want to I've no idea, given the quality of life there. I mean, c'mon- the people live in buildings looking like the illegitimate child of a tent and a hut (hent? tut?) and the goat's milk they drink is best not mentioned again. Regardless, it can all only lead to an epically epic struggle of epic proportions.
If you're a fan of fantasy, witty satire or ever wondered what Eye of Argon could've been with some coherence, this is one for you.
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